It has been too long since I have shared my thoughts. I have become a different person and I like the person that I have become. My journey through recovery continues but it looks different now. Life is still challenging but I no longer deal with it in an unhealthy way. I love my wife more than ever, but the pain that I have caused her is still sometimes there. It makes me sad to see her hurting. She still has questions and there will never be a day when there are none. My addiction and what it did will always be a part of who I was, but it will never define who I am. I am still in counseling and I will probably will always be. My only group now is my church men’s small group. We meet as men and share our experiences, thoughts, and feelings. I have a vision of a hopeful future where I can help other men defeat this addiction and live the life that God designed us for.