I have reached a point in my recovery where I have more clarity. I have made it this far by making drastic changes to my way of living. The addict’s dream is to move on and get back to normal. “Let’s focus on the future and forget the past.” Forgive and forget was a common theme. All of these were lies and part of the denial in active addiction.
Let’s be honest, normal didn’t work. Normal was broken and unhealthy. Normal was full of lies, manipulation, and gaslighting. In order for recovery to work, there must be real and drastic changes to every aspect of your life. The easy way would have been to stay in the normal, unhealthy way of living. I chose the hard way and decided to make changes to all aspects of my life. It took time, hard work and commitment.
I’m in a better place. I have a better, healthier marriage. I’m a better person at work and I can relate to people better. I’m a happier person and I can enjoy things that I couldn’t before. I have empathy for people. I can be vulnerable and show true emotions now. Overall my quality of life has improved.